Jonghyun has really passed away

Dec. 18th was truly a terrible day for the Kpop community as a whole. I remember going on the internet that day and rumors were quickly spreading that SHINee‘s Jonghyun had passed on. I sat there thinking, “no way this can be true can it?” I fully expected articles to start coming out any moment talking about how this was all just a fake elaborate rumor. Probably started by some random Anti from some random place but that for whatever reason had caught on. However, sadly that correction never came…

Instead what did happen was that more and more articles came forth with even more details proving to be true. Then soon his own friends came out on record with similar statements. To say it was disheartening would be an understatement. Because whether he was your bias or not, whether you followed this group or not, there is no denying the far reach all the members have had on the industry. Like they’ve been relevant for 9+years already meaning if you know Kpop, odds by now are you probably know SHINee too. So to find out one of the group’s members had died was enough to put a stop to the entire community.

Things were only made more sad later though. When it was made official that the reason for his passing was due to suicide. Apparently over the years he had struggled with depression and he had decided he had had enough of it. And so he chose to end the battle. Leaving a letter with a friend to be released if he ever actually went through with it. The contents, well, they were as heartbreaking as one would expect. In it he explains in painstaking detail the struggles he faced. And while I ultimately don’t agree with his decision to take his own life, the letter shows he put a lot of thought to his actions. Which I think makes the end result all the more heartbreaking.



Now I didn’t know much about Jonghyun specifically prior to this I must admit. However I have gone on to retroactively learn about him. And in doing so recently one song really stuck out to me. It was called A Gloomy Clock. I had heard it once upon a time  before without the lyrics and thought it was a nice song, but after going back to it I really appreciate it so much more today.

It’s sung by IU but has Jonghyun accompanying it and from what I’ve read was composed by him too. It was his debut as a composer in fact. After re-listening to it and understanding it’s meaning I have  realized just how much more of a true artist Jonghyun was and also how much of his own emotions he wore on his sleeve. If you haven’t heard it before I really hope that you would and that you would specially pay attention to the lyrics. I think after the latest events they will hold even more meaning. It’s not everyday artists in S.Korea touch on the topic of Depression like this, particularly idols.



In addition here is a short snippet of the same song but with the main parts of it covered by him. It really showcases how smooth, soothing, and comforting his vocals were. It’s only sad that he couldn’t find the same kind of support that he himself was to so many of his fans over the years. Hopefully some good can come out of this terrible event by sparking a more open conversation/dialogue on what is still looked as a very taboo topic in S.Korea, that of mental illness overall.



In the meantime, Jonghyun you’ve worked hard. I truly hope that at the very least your soul may be at rest now and your mind at ease.

(April 8, 1990 – December 18, 2017)


41 thoughts on “Jonghyun has really passed away

  1. I cried so hard when I found out. Jonhyun was my bias and SHINee’s Replay is one of my favorite songs.
    It’s so sad to me that in that song the “noona” they refer to is inspired by Jonghyun’s sister. They had a super close relationship and he adored her. She was the one who found him and called the police.

    I really hope that this tragic event will help open up the conversation about mental illness and that changes will be made. Personally, I think all trainees should begin seeing a therapist just as a matter of course because idol life is really hard.

    We love you Jonghyun, you did well.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Yes I too think celebrities in general should see a therapist as well. At least as a preemptive move because if only to deal with a lot of those negative and hurtful comments they get. I don’t care how much money they make, hearing those sorts of things must take a toll on anyone.

      Liked by 2 people

  2. I still have hard time to believe it. I know it happen, I saw video from the funeral, I saw the pain on the remaining member face, his friend.
    I knew he had depression, but I didn’t knew it was that bad.
    I really wish his doctor took him more seriously.

    Jonghyun was a talented artists, he love music, he was living for it. He is going to be missed.

    Liked by 2 people

    • I recently saw pictures of Onew floating about and it was so sad to see. You could easily see how much of a devastating ordeal all of this has been on him. I really hope this case opens peoples eyes to the importance of mental health.

      Liked by 1 person

      • I’m really worried about the other members. Onew has depression as well and Key used to cut. I really hope they have a good support system around them. I hope that for his family and friends and everyone he worked with. That they have someone they can talk to.
        But I’m a realist. Unless the government is starting some kind of awareness program to change the public’s opinion about mental health, nothing much will change. And with all the problems they currently struggle with, I can’t really see that being high on the priority list.


  3. That day, I think I’ll never forget it. Hearing about Taeyang’s engagement I was so happy and dancing around. And then someone commented that Jjongi was found dead or unconscious. We all started freaking out. And one part of me kinda new, that the worst had happened. It’s an open secret that he has always been struggling with depression and self-doubts, but everyone thought he was better this year. He seemed better. Which only proves that you never know what is truly going on. Which makes me even sadder thinking that every time I saw him on variety, on stage, at an event with a big smile, he was in so much pain. That the dream he worked so hard to achieve, was the thing which destroyed him in the end. Someone on Naver commented, that maybe if he had never become famous, he would still be here, just eating and drinking with his friends. That rings so true. And is also so painful.
    The only thing that relieves me a bit is knowing that he’ll never be forgotten. Not only by his fans, but by many more whose hearts he reached. He was so talented, so kind-hearted and let’s not forget his savage humor. I’ll never stop missing him.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I can relate because I too was reading a positive article when out of nowhere I read comments saying he had passed on. At the time not many sites I followed had covered it so i thought it really could be one of those fake rumors that were spreading. However when I saw Soompi, allkpop, and every other Kpop site you can think of reporting the same thing, my heart sank. Afterwards it was like all any kpop fan could talk about. Even non kpop sites covered the news.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Even if we’re usually biased towards one or a couple of groups, we’re still one fandom. That is probably the only heart-warming thing which happened. To see that no matter who you stan when something as horrible as this happens, people stand together. And I was also quite surprised by seeing the reports pop up on the ‘mainstream’ news. Some people even said that it was on TV in their respective home countries. But honestly, I also got a little irrationally angry at them. I read the guardian and they covered it as well and it felt to me that it was just for the clicks. They rarely cover kpop, and the articles they released just weren’t in depth and some details were just incorrect…I don’t know. Maybe it’s also me being overly protective? If that makes any sense? One of the Youtube News Channels I follow also covered it and I didn’t have the same reaction. Just because he felt more sincere to me. Ah, I don’t know.
        Anyway, wish you Happy Holidays!


  4. I was really sad about this. He was one of the few singers in this world that once you hear their voice, it resonates with you forever. He’s one of those people. No matter what language or musical background, his voice is magic.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. It is always a very sad thing when someone decides to take his own life no matter who it is. But for one so young it is incredibly heart breaking. A really very sad affair indeed, especially for such a great talent 😢

    Liked by 1 person

    • The good news is that even though he was here for a short while, he managed to leave a very big impact and manged to be a positive influence overall. For example, In recent days his fans have been doing all sorts of good deeds in his name. Like donating to the various chatitable organizations he supported. Seeing that sorta thing makes his passing at least a little bit easier.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Wow, that really is very touching indeed. I always think it’s amazing that people also manage to find a lot of strength in dealing with things like this by doing such wonderful and absolutely amazing deeds.


  6. I’ve been in absolute shock all week. It would be horrible if it were anyone, but when it’s Jonghyun, who made such an impact in reaching out about issues like depression and LGBTQ+ rights and who was just such a genuinely good and thoughtful person… he really meant and represented so much to so many people. It’s such a loss in so many ways and for so many reasons. I’ve been thinking a lot about his friends in SM especially, and of course the other SHINee members. It’s just… god, it’s such a loss to all of us.
    The blue moon in Japan did make me feel a little bit better, though. It really did feel like he was reaching out to us.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah, idol life is no joke. The struggle to the top is real and then even after going through it all things can get toxic real fast. Becuase of all sorts of reasons. Like Antis, dumb scandals, strict rules from management, etc. I hope other idols who are suffering right now and people in general can openly get the help they need. This needs to open up people’s eyes to the importance of mental health.


  7. I have never been more devastated by any news in my life. I was scrolling through my Instagram and I found posts that saying “rip jonghyun” I thought people were joking or there was something funny he did or some joke somewhere on the Korean entertainment industry. but no! he was gone for real. I wish people would not make the idols life miserable and tormenting. they work hard for us. they make our lives amazing. I really hope he is up there with the angels playing his kazoo and rocking the heaven with Whitney and MJ! i miss him. we all miss him.

    Liked by 1 person

    • In my opinion, the same way a lot of his fans have been reacting already. By celebrating his life. And promoting all the things that meant a lot to him. Like many fans have been donating to and promoting all the various charities he was fond of.

      Liked by 1 person

      • i SHOULD get ice cream. i had lots of chocolate tho cuz it’s a christmas party today. *eyebrow raise* i feel less sad… but not completely *SOB*
        how did you know ice cream helps depressed girls? that is a SMART THING TO KNOW! also chocolate. you can add that to your knowledge. lol oh, and blankets. very comforting. 😛 ^_^

        Liked by 1 person

      • no there isn’t ever a bad time to have ice cream. literally i would eat it all the time if i just had enough of it!

        i’m so happy you’re feeling festive. i lost my festive spirit yesterday when it was all used up at that party. and thanks. yes it did go %100 well except there were so many people that some of us had to eat in another room… in the dark… alone… lol jk it wasn’t that bad

        Liked by 1 person

      • i had THE BEST CHRISTMAS EVER!!!! i got everything i wanted, like boots, markers, the new TS album… and THE FOREVER TWILIGHT BOX! 🙂 yay. what did you get?

        i’m sure a sandy christmas is special. i’ve never had one (i’ve never even been to the beach), but i’m sure you were happy. hope you had the BEST CHRISTMAS EVER too!!! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • Oh it was cool, no doubt. I got to see a seal and some dolphins swimming in the distance! I took pictures but it was with my phone so they didnt come out as awesome as I hoped. Will probs share them on here, we shall see… 🙂

        When it comes to the gift department I got zero things. But before you start worrying about me, its because these last few years I have let people know I would prefer it that way. Lol Id rather people spend the money on themselves or better yet send it to some charities. But i did technically get the surprise trip and lunch was covered so I guess you can say I got that. Haha

        I think its cool you got what you wanted tho. But when you say “The Forever Twilight Box” are you talking about the books, movies, or what? O.O”

        Liked by 1 person

      • that is so cool. i got a seal stuffed animal for christmas. i luv it. you share your pics. pics of the ocean are awesome.

        I’M STILL WORRYING. lol i think u should get something just bc someone is stubborn enough to give it to u even if you don’t want it. you need to learn to actually ACCEPT GIFTS!! lol see? it was too late. i already started worrying. 😛

        I GOT THE MOVIES!!!! i luv everything about Twilight, but i wanted all the movies and the extended shit and i got it!!! so YEAH. i started yelling when i got it. ♥ it’s wonderful. 🙂 so i’m really happy.

        Liked by 1 person

      • I’ve watched the first movie a couple times, I had a good time watching it. Never saw the rest except bits and pieces here and there on TV. A lot of people around me are big on the books.

        For me I got more on the Hunger Games craze. I thought the first two movies of that were really good.

        Liked by 1 person

      • YOU SHOULD WATCH THE WHOLE SERIES!!!! come on man! it’s totally worth it! and i’m so glad you like it. not a lot of people do that i’ve met. in fact most people hate it. but my best friend likes it enough, and i REALLY like it. i’m not the kind of person who forces other people to like it, but i do appreciate it, if they do, that they don’t insult it. i’m just that way. 🙂 i personally recommend it for you tho. since you love everything and all. 😉

        I AM A HUNGER GAMES FAN TOO! did you watch the 3rd one? i thought it was excellent as well. i know it’s a bit sad and all, but the END… ohman. the feeeeeeels. i’m so glad you like it too. 🙂 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  8. I wasn’t that into shinee, I didn’t even know the members or Jonghyun, but this is still really sad and I still can’t believe it until now, I had a friend who was really into SHINee and Jonghyun was her bias.
    At least more people are going to listen to his own music and appreaciate him. They don’t say dead artists sell better for no reason.

    Liked by 1 person

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